Much of the suffering in our life comes from our wrong perceptions. Our strong views and beliefs have made us blind to the things happening around us. Everything we see, hear or experience comes from a specific viewpoint that is biased from our past, our beliefs and our thinking processes.
Most of the Time Our Perceptions Are Wrong
Unfortunately we are victims of our own wrong perceptions. We should always question our perceptions. We should ask ourselves, “Am I seeing this situation clearly?” or “am I correctly interpreting what this person is trying to tell me”? Always ask, and observe without judgement.
There is not a single, ultimate reality that defines the one, true sequence of events in your life. Everyone assumes and wants to think it is their perspective. But it is important to remember that everyone has their own view and interpretation of reality based on their own:
- Past experiences
- Thinking processes
- Beliefs
People tend to naturally judge and apply labels to their experiences. Most of the time the interpretation is not accurate. This is not really our fault, it is simply the way our brains interpret information.
Communication and Judgement
When conversations occur, many things happen without our awareness. Our brains process and interpret without our understanding. This is cause for much of the misunderstanding we experience.
In the first step, the other person has an intention of something they wish to communicate. Its important that we do not assume that they are clear in their communication or their ability to express themselves.
Next, we hear the words and tone they are using and we attempt to interpret their intention. Our mind will quickly try to pattern match what they are saying from our past experiences. If it finds a close enough match – it will associate our past experience with what we hear. The match our brains use does not have to be accurate. This step can distort or exaggerate what we hear causing us to judge the other person’s intention incorrectly.
If the communication triggers a sensitivity from our past, we will react and hear things differently than what is being intended. The topic could also trigger something we feel very strongly about (from our beliefs). In this case, it can easily shut us down or thinking if we are willing to listen or not.
To prevent communication misunderstandings, its important that we:
- Recognize that our brains can influence our perception incorrectly
- Do not make assumptions
- Do not take it personally
- Repeat back what we heard and verify it is correct
Situations and Judgement
Situations perceptions are similar to conversations but there are a few differences. Our brains still make decisions and influence our perception without our participation and awareness.
However, the sensitivity of our ego and past experiences can skew our perceptions without someone there to verify intention. Because of this, we have to reply on our own self-perception and view of the circumstance. This is far less reliable than a simple 2-way communication with someone.
Its important to simply remember that your mind wants to make quick judgements to conserve energy. We naturally will resist, delay or avoid instead of dealing with something unknown or scary to us. Fear drives many of our behaviors.
When we learn to reduce our judgement, we can avoid emotional reactions and reduce our suffering. The more we can remain mindful and present (in the moment), the more we can see through the fog of our broken patterns.
How to reduce wrong perceptions in situations:
- Practice mindful breathing to calm our mind
- Stay anchored in the present moment
- Simply observe instead of reacting or judging
- Learn to let go and trust life
Calm Your Mind
We can see or hear more clearly when our minds are calm. When we are open to listening or experiencing without judgement. We need to practice stopping and calming our mind before speaking or as we listen. Our ability to be present is very important. Without this, we will simply react and allow our minds to manipulate our interpretation. This often results in wrong perceptions.
Much of our suffering comes from our wrong perceptions. We should be very careful when we feel strong emotions and feelings from our perceptions. These are especially vulnerable to misunderstanding.
The more we think about things, the more our mind will distort our view and play out stories in our head. Our mind and our ego is addicted to these stories. It helps define us and our sense of reality. Know that even though you feel these things, they are unhealthy cravings that cannot be satisfied.
These stories are not only the things we hope for and desire, they are also our fears, our doubts and our suffering. To counter this is quite simple and effective in practice:
- Calm our minds
- Remain in the present moment
We can begin this practice with mindfulness and mindful breathing. It has been practiced for centuries and is quite effective in vastly increasing our acceptance of “what is” and our happiness. Build this into a daily habit and your life will improve greatly.
Always Question Your Perceptions
Instead of coming to some conclusion or labeling our understanding, we should always question our perceptions. We should practice just listening. If we simply listen mindfully and observe, we can allow others to communicate while we are truly present and available to them. If we suspect we do not understand, always repeat back what we think and ask the other person if we understand correctly.
Our brains always want to label and define things. To place things neatly into repeatable patterns. We often label things as:
- Good or bad
- Mean or Nice
- Success or failure
- Lucky or unlucky
This is something we should practice letting go of. These concepts will simply feed and nourish our wrong perceptions. which in turn, will continue to feed our suffering. Let us learn to just be present in the moment without reacting or labeling.
We cannot possibly imagine the unseen impact or purpose of an event in our life. Many things that happen will not be understood from our single view or perspective. We would likely be amazed if we could see the real impact or influence of a single event.
Practice Observing Without Judgement
The best thing we can do is to become more mindful in our daily life. To simply observe the present moment without judgement. Lets commit to questioning our perceptions and remember that they are often wrong. Lets not be manipulated be our own mental processes. Lets reduce our inner need for conclusions, judgements and attempts to label everything.
Lets be open to learning, growth and change.
Wishing you peace and love,
Until next time…
—
Greg
